Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Stunning Space Film Premieres June 9 at Natural History’s Planetarium - West Side Rag

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

The sadness was still there.

And the sadness?

Why have cell phones, the internet, and reality TV turned the world into a toilet, as this has not advanced us in any way?

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

I was tired of trying and failing.

Baseball Gameday: 5/31/25 vs. TCU - Oregon State University Athletics

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

I test TVs for a living — and I recommend these 2 TVs above everything else - Tom's Guide

It’s here now, writing to you.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

What is the craziest thing that you've ever witnessed?

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

My husband asked me why do I keep on complaining about him cheating. Why don't I just leave?

I was tired of fighting.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

Uber announces a life-changing new feature - TheStreet

It’s still here.

Be who you already are.

You are like me, then.

Can you describe your experience taking the AIPMT/NEET entrance exam? Did you feel nervous or afraid while entering the examination hall and writing the exam?

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

I had run out of hope.

WA whooping cough cases soar as vaccination rates drop - The Seattle Times

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.